Concerning St. John’s College

St. John’s College, through its fascinating, roundabout Program, seeks to investigate questions about humanity. What is humanity? Is there a timeless aspect to humanity? What does it mean to be a good human being? How can I learn humanity? Can I learn humanity? And the questions continue for as long as anyone has the breath and time to ask them. An ultimately, I’ve noticed, the learning experience has one central focus: self.
I wrote that last line with mixed feelings of intrigue and distaste. Intrigue, because I am human, and there is nothing more central to natural thought than being. And distaste, because in my philosophical adventures self has been a dirty word; immediately (perhaps incorrectly) I associate self with selfishness, self-centeredness, and consequently godlessness.
But there’s another thing I’ve noticed. The focus is self, but not exclusively the maintenance or preservation of self as much as the transference and transformation of self. For some, there is certainly room for pride, but it’s not necessarily part of the academic endeavor. St. John’s College is about training self. While a person can train himself in pride, arrogance, selfishness, etc.—as at any learning institution—the training is not limited to an inward look. The focus is self, but the goal may be something greater, something beyond self. It’s important to me to realize the difference between the focus and the goal, just as the medium for artwork is never more important than the final piece. Now I need to articulate my goal.
For some, the goal may never extend beyond self, just as an artist may never allow form to come to his paintings, or allow rhythm into his composition, or use the conventions of natural language in his poetry. (Is that bad? Some think so. But I’m not going to judge them, because my goal extends beyond myself and beyond the choices of others.) I choose to have form in my paintings, rhythm in my music, and grammar in my poetry. My goal extends beyond myself; or more articulately, outside of myself.
There is additional intrigue when examining the school’s motto: FACIO LIBEROS EX LIBERIS LIBRIS LIBRAQUE, which translates from Latin to mean, “I make free men from children by means of books and a balance.” Following this, my goal is aided by the understanding that I’m not limited to self, and I can be free from self.
And here’s my formal declaration, my goal: to become less, so God can become greater in me. St. John’s College has set the focus. I will ask the questions. I will seek the answers. I will not be limited to make their focus my destination, because God has given me wisdom enough to know there is another horizon after this one.